The Ultimate 'Dheedhs'

1: 45 AM, I was working on a project when got a call from Imran's mother.

"Beta Imran has gone through an accident. He is in the hospital, quite serious"

OH damn!... I immediately switched off the work I was doing and called other friends... "AKU Emergency, jaldi!". I didn't tell anyone at home where was I going and just rushed out. I was shaken but not stunned, apprehensive of accident's severity but I somewhat knew what must have happened... I know Imran well.. and his ways.

15 minutes and here I was standing with his elder brother outside the room where doctors were working on him. 

"I don't know man! Whats ***king wrong with him. Hazaar baar samjhaya ke mat chalao tez, mat karo bike racing.. par nahin!". Yes, I was right like everyone else. This all was expected since a long time. 

________________

After 6 days of unconsciousness and critical care, he finally resumed talking. That day, we just got to talk 4, 5 minutes before his father came in with food and all.  But those 5 minutes... that conversation... defines the way we live our lives. A belief that makes us poles apart from the rest. And it makes us come back for more...

First minute of our conversation:

"Kiya yaar!!! What's all this shit man?"

"Kiya?"

"Hmmmm.. Yeh!" I pointed at his broken plastered leg.

"Yeh? Aisehi. Chal Chor, aur suna!"

"Tu bata. Dard horaha hai?"

"Thora"

"Hmmmm.."

"But you know... I'm satisfied"

"Why?"

"Cuz just before I went down, I did what I wanted to do since a long long time... I actually performed that stunt! Now can you believe that?"

"Really? You did it? But how?"

*Smiles* For next 2, 3 minutes... he overlooked his pain and I forgot to be sympathetic. 

_________________

People like Imran are not afraid of the punishments. They are not afraid of fresh starts. They can start from anywhere they want. Their minds dream, their hearts feel, their souls survive. Sometimes... they might feel embarrassed... cuz of the failures they meet in this rationally but artificially crafted world. They might have a guilty conscience... cuz of the pain they give to people who love... cuz of the society finds them inapt for their own understanding.. 

But then..

They do have a bad memory too. No guilt no pain can halt the chase they revere so much. Made with a built-in ability to kill their  past and get back to life, these are actually the stubborn children of God. They are the 'Indisputable Dheedhs ' of the modern times...

And I somewhere believe.. They are the only ones who actually LIVE!

Image: DeviantArt 

Thomasdelonge

 

Crack

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"Noor! I got highest in Process Engineering"

"Wow! That's great man. Well done!"

"Chor yaar re-sit tha!!!"

"Hain? Acha aur kitney bandey they?"

"Mein akela"

Jazzi laughs: "Haha! Abay yeh kiya chutiya-pana hai!!"

____________________________________

Nothings coming tonight. This is one un-animated and un-communicative version of pure expression. Oxymoron? May be. But then one gets to hear so much of them these days no? Stuff like legal murders and a smart ass! Mom suggests, "Wait, have patience". Now can you do both? You can either wait being edgy or can patiently say no to stuff coming ahead. Haina? But what to do with mom, she thinks other way. And she just can't be wrong. An incorrect mother would be a big BIG oxymoron! So you have to choose... your mother or your patience?

Hmmm... Such interesting name. Oxymoron? Being a hardcore chemistry student, it makes me think. Is it one oxidized form of a moron? And what if it reduces? De-oxy-moron or simply moron? What the hell? 

Hey... Chemistry and morons. Another oxymo? Those who have studied adv. chemistry would deny!

You think am crazy and I think you're.  Crazy me is equals to crazy you, cancellation on both sides and there's the answer. You and me! This signifies what? Simple. When we are together, there is intellectuality, rationalism, sense and peace. Anything but that mutual craziness.

Well... Do you believe that? I mean you me and logic? 

What the hell! Give me some oxygen, am going moronic!!

60 Seconds

60 seconds between us. 6 meters ahead of me. Living in a same enclosure, this is what separates us. You, me and these 60 seconds, that's all. Now we are not like those people... they have so much time you know. They can actually go back to that debris and isolate every single decision they took. They can look for the shadows of people they lost, and try to retract images. In their lives, they can bring out their old muddy sculptures back from their subconscious store rooms and wait for the day when everything shall come alive. 

We can't do it, can we? They are after me but I don't care really. I'm just about these 60 seconds between us. You got to know this. Just like my past, I can relate with those people and those places. But I can't go back. Glory awaits me.  

Isn't this a beautiful thought? Whatever I do today, my love, my desires and all those aspirations... all that is about to come... 

I can't be there before you. You got to protect me. Take decisions and act. To make things work for me. 

And you have 60 seconds! 

Thought Provoking!

"What literature needs most to tell and investigate today are humanity's basic fears: the fear of being left outside, and the fear of counting for nothing, and the feelings of worthlessness that come with such fears; the collective humiliations, vulnerabilities, slights, grievances, sensitivities, and imagined insults, and the nationalist boasts and inflations that are their next of kin ... Whenever I am confronted by such sentiments, and by the irrational, overstated language in which they are usually expressed, I know they touch on a darkness inside me. We have often witnessed peoples, societies and nations outside the Western world–and I can identify with them easily–succumbing to fears that sometimes lead them to commit stupidities, all because of their fears of humiliation and their sensitivities. I also know that in the West–a world with which I can identify with the same ease–nations and peoples taking an excessive pride in their wealth, and in their having brought us the Renaissance, the Enlightenment, and Modernism, have, from time to time, succumbed to a self-satisfaction that is almost as stupid".

Orhan Pamuk

Turkish Author

Now

It feels good to write after such a hiatus. Yes I wasn't really writing here but that doesn't mean I wasn't at all. Academics you know! Research papers, reports, essays, articles and yes... here I am. Safe and sound, back to my normal indigestible world of social parodies and personal mimicries. I enjoy working 13 14 hours a day as one team leader interacting, organizing and playing under pressure but this space of mine, this very moment when am alone makes me the person I am. Good bad whatever. My love to experiment with Truth and entertain issues touching limits of sanity is my strength. My home ground. The point where everything is deliberately out of control meticulously tangled to avoid cliches and generalizations.

Have been reading some blogs. Marina, Komal, Maria... I really like their work and yes, must say they all have that beautiful feminine way to words. Some more names may be.     

Feeling stronger. Ready for a niche. Focused. Love??

Work? " Double Check". 

Perfection

He is the Man

Al Pacino